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Mafia love. Crime love... [18+]

#9
:x:x Buna :x:x

Descrierea lasa de dorit, nu am simtit absolut nimic cand citeam lungile propozitii. Incearca sa folosesti si figuri de stil, nici macar comparatii nu prea am vazut ( Daca sunt cinci in tot capitolul sa sti ca este bine, dar nu prea cred.). Actiunea este parca la curse de masini, cred ca ar fi trebuit s-o incetinesti. Stiu ca poate nu ai avut timp, dar adaca nu ai avut nu postai.
:x:x Bye Bye :x:x



Răspunsuri în acest subiect
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Icsdeee. - 25-01-2011, 11:43 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Prevented :D - 28-01-2011, 10:18 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 29-01-2011, 04:51 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 03-02-2011, 06:37 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Icsdeee. - 03-02-2011, 06:48 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 13-02-2011, 09:27 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Hakusor. - 14-02-2011, 06:12 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 05-03-2011, 11:44 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Rose ^^ - 08-05-2011, 08:31 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Rose ^^ - 28-06-2011, 09:42 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 28-06-2011, 10:58 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Prevented :D - 30-06-2011, 11:25 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Rose ^^ - 05-07-2011, 07:00 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 06-07-2011, 06:06 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 14-07-2011, 03:31 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 15-07-2011, 11:38 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Rose ^^ - 18-07-2011, 09:32 AM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Rose ^^ - 18-07-2011, 09:20 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 18-07-2011, 11:15 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Rose ^^ - 19-07-2011, 09:20 AM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... - de Miranda. - 19-07-2011, 05:46 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 06-08-2011, 02:15 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 06-08-2011, 03:28 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 06-08-2011, 07:18 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [+16] - de Miranda. - 06-08-2011, 07:31 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 10-08-2011, 06:12 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 10-08-2011, 10:01 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 11-08-2011, 09:28 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 12-08-2011, 07:38 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 12-08-2011, 09:30 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 14-08-2011, 02:44 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 15-08-2011, 12:56 AM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 15-08-2011, 02:45 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 15-08-2011, 03:18 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Miranda. - 17-08-2011, 11:00 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [15+] - de Rose ^^ - 18-08-2011, 04:06 PM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [18+] - de Rose ^^ - 23-08-2011, 10:04 AM
RE: Mafia love. Crime love... [18+] - de Rose ^^ - 07-09-2011, 10:51 PM

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