Letter to Santa Generator

[Addeh]

Dear Satan Claus – Devourer of Children’s Souls,

This year, I have been a very passive aggressive little girl. I have sometimes lied, and I have rarely helped my mommy with their pyramid schemes. And I always say thank you, which makes me seem like I care, and so I deserve lots of presents this year!

Please bring all this stuff for me and the people in my life: For my mommy, please bring daddy’s testicles in a vise. For my daddy, please bring a new topaz-studded ass plug. For my big brother, please bring a soccer ball. For my doggy, please bring a chew toy. Oh – and for my pool boy, please bring some fruit cake.

Now about me! Please bring me all of the Spider Man breakfast cereal, and front row tickets to Eminem – plus backstage passes so I can get autographs! Oh, and please don’t forget to bring my Lamborghini Diablo VT 6.0. But if you can’t, just remember that more than anything Santa, what I really really want is just $100,000,000!

Anyway, I hope you like the cookies I left out for you.

Love,

Adi R.

PS: Please say hello to Ralph, the heartless Elfin slavemaster.

PPS: Oh yeah, and remember Daria? She has been a really perverted weener all year long and doesn’t deserve any Christmas presents. So please don’t forget to put coal in their stocking. Thanks!


Dunno ce-am scris acolo, dar sunt sigura de ultima parte!