21-06-2011, 10:03 AM
Hello :) Ma atras titlul si ma asteptam la ceva mai bun de la primul capitol dar sper sa te perfectionezi pe parcurs :)
Pentru un prim capitol este prea scurt si este mult dialog, nu prea ai descriere si naratiunea putin. Incearca sa mai lucrezi la acest fin chiar daca nu este o idee chiar deosebita vreau sa vad cu se dezvolta lucrurile. :D
in caz ca tea suparat commul meu trimite mi un pm :)
mult noroc si
Ja ne ! :*
Pentru un prim capitol este prea scurt si este mult dialog, nu prea ai descriere si naratiunea putin. Incearca sa mai lucrezi la acest fin chiar daca nu este o idee chiar deosebita vreau sa vad cu se dezvolta lucrurile. :D
in caz ca tea suparat commul meu trimite mi un pm :)
mult noroc si
Ja ne ! :*
To the right, To the left, we will fight to the death
To the Edge of the Earth, It's a Brave New World from the last to the first
To the right, To the left, We will fight to the death
To the Edge of the Earth it's a Brave New World it's a Brave New World It's A Brave New World
A Brave New World
The war is won,
the war is won,
a brave new world
![[Imagine: beautyfullgrl.png]](http://i551.photobucket.com/albums/ii467/cepulamea/Semnaturi/beautyfullgrl.png)
I am a simple girl and you're a crazy boy....we can be friends? [+16 / +18] - http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php...649&page=1
Inimile noastre bat ROCK [+16/+18] - http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php...548&page=1
To the Edge of the Earth, It's a Brave New World from the last to the first
To the right, To the left, We will fight to the death
To the Edge of the Earth it's a Brave New World it's a Brave New World It's A Brave New World
A Brave New World
The war is won,
the war is won,
a brave new world
I am a simple girl and you're a crazy boy....we can be friends? [+16 / +18] - http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php...649&page=1
Inimile noastre bat ROCK [+16/+18] - http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php...548&page=1